SJennyWe are social creatures and as such, we need to communicate. It helps to talk things through when we’re hurt, confused, happy, or feel any strong emotion. Forgiveness is no different. In an earlier post we talked about how important it is to be very clear on what you are forgiving and the pain it’s causing you. That’s sometimes easier said than done. We also talked extensively about the fact that forgiveness is a process. And during that process some days are easier than others. To be perfectly honest, some days it’s really hard to stick to feelings of forgiveness. Some days it’s hard to recall that list of things to be grateful for that we talked about yesterday. Some days are just plain bad days and on those days you may need a little extra help.
That’s when it’s good to open up and talk to someone. This could be anyone in your community. Maybe you have a talk with your spouse or a close friend. Maybe it’s talking to a religious leader or mentor. And maybe it’s having a civil, but frank and honest discussion with the person who hurt you. Words are powerful and opening a dialog about the anger and pain your feeling can be very powerful.
First of all, talking it out can be a great way to let off a little steam and release some of the pressure you may be under. Venting, in other words, can be a very good thing. It helps you make room for both rational thought and more positive feelings. Keeping everything bottled up is usually not the best thing to do. Find someone to talk to and vent when you need to.
Talking as well as listening is also a great way to look at the situation a little more objectively. When we feel hurt, it’s hard to stay objective. Conversations can help us get there. They may help us find out that we weren’t slighted as much as we thought. They can clear up misunderstandings and provide us with additional information. They also help us sort through our emotions and thoughts.
When you’re not sure what to do next or where to turn, give talking it out a try. Open up a dialog about what you’re feeling and how you’re trying to get past the issues and embrace forgiveness. I promise it will help you become clear on your path and help you on your journey.
Please remember how important it is to speak your truth, but also be open to hearing someone else speak theirs. Make sure you use respectful communication and if the topic get too hot, have a respectful plan to step back for a moment to avoid saying things you can’t take back. No name calling, no shouting … elevate the vibration of your communication. Speak AND listen.
